Shingles. Valtrax. And OMG I FEEL ITCHY!

by Meredith on January 6, 2013

Okay, so Shaun Soleau has shingles.

I know. I, like you, had the same reaction. WHAT ARE YOU, EFFING 90-YEARS-OLD?! 

So I am trying to be the good wife. The good wife means I am still in my pajamas, and I haven’t showered in two days because he was the last one to use the shower, and I am avoiding all surfaces that he has touched.

Shaun Soleau was prescribed Valtrax. And Valtrax is what they prescribe you when you have the gift that keeps on giving. Even though WebMD seems to think I won’t catch what he’s spreading around, I don’t want his gift. Plus a doctor told us he is contagious.

And do you know what else sucks? I just did it with him two days ago. And now all I can think about is catching shingles and having to pick up my own herpes medicine at the pharmacy. In which case, I would tell everyone I see at that pharmacy,

I have the shingles, not herpes! Hey! You! Over there by the maxi pads! I am talking to you! Shingles! I have the shingles! Not herpes! I’ve never even had a cold sore, you know! I am a clean person! 

And this makes me a bad wife. But I don’t care. I have irrational fears of medical things, and he should have known going into this marriage that I am not very nurturing.

I can smell my cookie and butt from here.

It’s oddly good smelling, but in my own stinky kind of way.

Do you know what I mean? Like, do you ever smell your own cookie and ass and think, hmmmm… even when I stink, I still sort of smell interesting.

Maybe if he had fixed the shower in the master bathroom, we wouldn’t be using the same shower that the kids use, and I would be able to go in there and take a shower right now.

I’m going up there right now to make the kids take showers, just to see what happens to them. They have had vaccines (I think) for this crap.

Freaking Shaun.

Freaking shingles.

Freaking Monday is tomorrow, and I am going to have to shower or I’ll freak everyone out at work. I imagine no one likes my interesting cookie smell besides me.

Is this the seven year itch? WHY DO I SUDDENLY FEEL SO ITCHY?!

{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }

Shaun

I blame my little brother who got chicken pox when he was about 7 then gave it to me

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Meredith

Ooo! Good call! I like blaming things on your family members!

XOXOXO

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Michael

I got a weird case of shingles as a side effect of bronchitis when I was 16. No fun at all, but I was focused more on my labored breathing than the horrible rash. Here’s my advice…ask around for which gyms have private showers and buy a day pass. A lot of them give out 7-day trial memberships for free. Wear flip flops. Bring disinfectant spray if you want. But there’s probably a lower chance of as communicable of a virus as shingles in there as at home. And I’m pretty confident that your coworkers won’t find your cookie to smell as “oddly good smelling” as you do.

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John

You can’t catch the shingles from the sh0wer any more than you can from the toilet seat…or silverware….or coffee cups….or bed sheets….

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Meredith

Then how do I catch it?

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John

According from WebMD, you can’t catch it from someone with it, especially if you never had the chicken pox.

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Justin

Can’t you go to like, a truck stop or something for your shower?

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Meredith

I think there are REAL herpes at those places, which would just end in the same result. Me, at the pharmacy, buying Valtrax.

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Tawny

I have had shingles twice and I am 32. Once after a disastrous Disney vacation with the in-laws and after we built our first home.
Both times I swear the pharmacist gave me the side eye do I announced I had a bad case of shingles. Lol
My husband had it at 34 last year after a grueling month at work and his immune system was in the shitter!

Stay healthy. That shit hurts!!!

Also my cookie and butt smell like a stranger’s since I got pregnant. I hate it.

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Meredith

Oh, yeah. I hated the pregnant swamp cookie and butt smell. It’s good to be back to my interesting self again.

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hdj

OMG! This tangent almost made me pee myself.

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Drazil

Oh my God – I’ve known many people with shingles and they all say it’s hell on Earth BUT I have never heard of another family member catching them so that’s good news. Poor thing.

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Shaun

I think it is mild at best. I’m not really in much pain?

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Jennifer

David had a few months ago and I didn’t catch it. I think you are good to go.

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Peggy

Shingles suck!! Very painful. I feel the need to mention that not all people who contract herpes is dirty, or slutty. Shit happens to good people. It’s hard enough to deal with the personal shame/guilt of dealing with such a burden, society makes it 1000% worse by treating it like a death sentence. Sorry. I didn’t have the intention of ranting. Just hits close to home. Hope Sean feels better soon.

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stephgas

my dad had shingles when he was like 51. it was pretty bad. i’ve never seen him so sick. and i helped take care of him and i didn’t catch them. but i had the chicken pox when i was a kid… but so did he. shingles confuses me A LOT. i just don’t want it.

also, i thought you were talking about a real cookie at first. like, a chocolate chip cookie or something. and i was like, why is meredith smelling a cookie AND her butt? this makes no sense.

then it made sense. i’d take my chances showering in the house shower. gym showers are :x

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Christina Cherro

I just got over shingles on MY FACE! Go ahead Meredith, I have already heard it but I will indulge you. No, my face has not been anywhere it shouldn’t have been, really. And I am 40 but I do work in a nursing home. This shit hurts. Besides so you know how stupid I look walking around with a freaking band aid on my face? NOT COOL.

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Reagan

You can’t catch shingles from someone else….but the doc was right when he said Shaun is contagious. He’s contagious because he can give chicken pox to someone who hasn’t had it yet and hasn’t been vaccinated for chicken pox. So as far as his being contagious goes, he needs to steer clear of children who haven’t had the chicken pox vaccine, pregnant women (he can give chicken pox to the fetus), and severely immune depressed people (because if your immune system is very depressed you can catch chicken pox again).

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Mackenzie

YOU CAN’T CATCH SHINGLES! I am a doctor and I say so. Shingles is a reactivation of the chicken pox virus that you carry in your body. Do you feel better? Go shower.

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Anna

I am totally with you on the occasional-enjoying-your-own-funk thing. I see no one else has admitted that, but I want you to know that I do!

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Erica

Oh Meredith I do adore you so!

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Allison

I was completely awesome and had it in 8th grade. During the semester I had gym, so I would change and everyone would be all “OMG, what’s wrong with your chest?!?”

Fun Times.

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Heather walker

Its only contagious if you’ve never had chicken pox. And you’d still only get chicken pox…NOT Shingles. Your man is in a lot of pain and it’s not a laughing matter. You sound unbelievably insensitive. I was breast feeding my daughter when I got it and she didn’t get Shingles or chicken pox…thank god. Although I stopped when they gave me Valtrex and other pain meds. I hope your man had a speedy recovery and you are only kidding and helped him through the bad times. What ever happened to “in sickness and health” ? Shame…Educate yourself…

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