Okay, so Shaun Soleau has shingles.
I know. I, like you, had the same reaction. WHAT ARE YOU, EFFING 90-YEARS-OLD?!
So I am trying to be the good wife. The good wife means I am still in my pajamas, and I haven’t showered in two days because he was the last one to use the shower, and I am avoiding all surfaces that he has touched.
Shaun Soleau was prescribed Valtrax. And Valtrax is what they prescribe you when you have the gift that keeps on giving. Even though WebMD seems to think I won’t catch what he’s spreading around, I don’t want his gift. Plus a doctor told us he is contagious.
And do you know what else sucks? I just did it with him two days ago. And now all I can think about is catching shingles and having to pick up my own herpes medicine at the pharmacy. In which case, I would tell everyone I see at that pharmacy,
I have the shingles, not herpes! Hey! You! Over there by the maxi pads! I am talking to you! Shingles! I have the shingles! Not herpes! I’ve never even had a cold sore, you know! I am a clean person!
And this makes me a bad wife. But I don’t care. I have irrational fears of medical things, and he should have known going into this marriage that I am not very nurturing.
I can smell my cookie and butt from here.
It’s oddly good smelling, but in my own stinky kind of way.
Do you know what I mean? Like, do you ever smell your own cookie and ass and think, hmmmm… even when I stink, I still sort of smell interesting.
Maybe if he had fixed the shower in the master bathroom, we wouldn’t be using the same shower that the kids use, and I would be able to go in there and take a shower right now.
I’m going up there right now to make the kids take showers, just to see what happens to them. They have had vaccines (I think) for this crap.
Freaking Monday is tomorrow, and I am going to have to shower or I’ll freak everyone out at work. I imagine no one likes my interesting cookie smell besides me.
Is this the seven year itch? WHY DO I SUDDENLY FEEL SO ITCHY?!