Blogging is ruining the careers of women.
And trust me, I’m not about to tell you it’s ruining careers because they put too much out there. It’s actually the complete opposite.
This blog is three-years-old this month. Happy birthday, Blog.
In the past three years, I have been given some amazing opportunities as a result of this little blog, but I’ve only truly made any sort of consistent money over the past 12 months (besides the occasional $500 here and there).
I was on ABC’s 20/20, I’ve traveled to very cool places, and I’ve worked with great brands. I now write for two totally awesome online magazines, Fistful of Talent and Curvy Girl Guide. It has also launched a speaking career for me, something I never saw coming.
This blog has put me on the map as someone who knows a thing or two about business, and many of you have reached out to me for career advice (something I gladly give, as helping people in their careers is my true passion).
I remember when I began blogging, and I thought,
This blog is going to make me rich and famous and I’ll be able to become a work-at-home mother. This blog is going to afford me more time with my family, all while doing something I love. Writing.
Looking back now, I had no idea that it would take on a life of its’ own, thus making me irrelevant if I wasn’t going to work each day, keeping up on all things Human Resources.
Do I regret starting a blog? No. Never.
Has it caused some serious damage to some of my personal relationships? Absolutely. It has absolutely offended people, and I have absolutely lost friends as a direct result of telling it like it is via public forum.
But that’s just it. This blog is honest.
The honesty and rawness of my over-sharing has made people come back to the site (and sometimes leave forever, but more than not, come back). Talking about everything from death, to wearing tampons, is what has ultimately afforded me awesome new adventures.
And since we’re being so honest, the honesty is what has resulted in additional income for my family.
Blogging destroys careers, when women aren’t smart about what they’re doing.
If you really want to put yourself on the map, you have to be honest in your writing. You have to open yourself up to criticism. You have to be raw. And a lot of bloggers? They aren’t willing to do it.
Let me tell you a little secret, if you think people want to read about your perfect life… you are sadly mistaken. People want to relate to you. And if they cannot relate to you, you will never make a dime.
According to Forbes, 18.9 million women write blogs. EIGHTEEN POINT NINE MILLION. And I am certain of these 18.9 million women, a lot of them are hoping to make some money blogging in order to live out that work-from-home dream. If they tell you they aren’t in it for the money, they are LYING to you.
I personally know exactly two women who make enough money to stay at home. TWO. I am not one of them. And I wouldn’t trade my day job, to do what they do at home, for the world.
It’s not a glamorous life. They are juggling multiple sites, constant criticism for sharing so much with the world, Skype calls with brands, being their own talent manager, and non-stop writing… all with a small child (or three) sitting on their lap.
Ladies, don’t quit your day jobs.
Blogging for money takes work. It takes a lot of work. It takes more work than your office job ever will. And it takes the ability to open yourself up and over-share all aspects of your life, which opens you up to the haters, something most people cannot emotionally handle. But in the words of my blogging mentor,
Having someone spew hate at you, just means you’ve made it.
If you think you’ll become the next Jenny Lawson or Brittany Gibbons, keep in mind that they both kept their day jobs until they made enough money to have the ability to stay at home. Heather Armstrong getting fired from her job, as a result of her honesty, is truly what launched her career as a blogger. All three of these women do more than just write on their personal blogs to earn what they’re earning today. And I’m 100% certain, that if they financially had to go back to work in an office one day, they are smart enough women to go find a day job before their household is in financial ruins.
So stop calling on successful bloggers, asking them for advice about making money doing this weird thing, refuse to take their advice about the amount of work that goes into it, and then complain about not having any money because you’ve already QUIT. YOUR. JOB.
That’s just stupid.
And annoying.
Not everyone is going to run a profitable blog. You probably won’t make it.
Chances are (and this hurts, but it’s true) you won’t make ANY money doing this. You’ll refuse to put the required effort into it.
Don’t ruin your career chasing this work-from-home dream, when you aren’t even doing it right in the first place.
What do you think? Am I being too harsh on those following a dream? Or do you also see women ruining their careers, and their family’s income, in order to become a work-from-home blogger?
{ 28 comments… read them below or add one }
110% FOR REALS.
Meredith,
Agree. I am in the minority, and I never had aspirations to have a blog that made me famous. I’m also not a mommy blogger. I’m a mom who blogs, but you are right. A lot of people have a pipe dream of fame and fortune. It is not easy and I have worked ridiculous hours doing what I do, but I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.
I’ve made family members angry and lost friendships too but such is life. I’d rather be living a life happy and being myself than walking on eggshells. That is something I am not good at.
Blogging has in fact ruined my career. I can never go back to the run of the mill HR Director. I’m forever tainted and likely unemployable because companies are scared I have a following, a fan club, and thus control that they do not have and when going to court for your company, having a blog is a liability. At least from the view of my former corporate employer it was, and I can see that point of view. I will forever be a consultant, thought leader, or marketing guru because of my blog.
Thanks for posting this. I’m a fan and I loved your 20/20 segment.
JMM
I would hire you to be my HR lady.
The Internet is not a magical cash cow. It hasn’t been since 1999.
Brands will not pay attention to you if you have no following. WE KNOW. We see your comment sections, your Twitter followers (we can even see if your Twitter followers are FAKE, you Fakey McFakerson), we see how often people mention you on Twitter and oodles and oodles of other things that I’m not going to list here because it is CREEPY what we can see.
And for some brands, that raw honesty isn’t going to click with them. And that’s fine, it will for others. But don’t try to jam yourself into some persona that you THINK will fit the brand, because you will get that persona wrong and just embarrass yourself.
Okay, clearly I have a lot of feelings about this so I’m just going to take a step back now.
No, keep going. I think they need to know. I get so tired of people thinking it’s easy.
Also be SUPER-SUPER-CAREFUL with your day job rules.
I have a friend who wanted to archive her event & wedding gig in Boston with a blog. I was like, “TALK TO YOUR BOSS FIRST.” And her boss laid out the rules of what she could and could not mention about wedding attendees and events before she could get herself into any unintentional trouble
Completely agree with you. The harsh reality of blogging (or starting a foundation or selling vitamins or etc) is that it is not all cotton candy and lollipops. You have to be good at what you do, but you also have to be lucky and hit the right audience audience at the right time. I have so much more respect for someone who tells me the truth and doesn’t sugar coat it than someone who tells me that everything is wonderful and the sailing is smooth because the sun shines on your face with the wind at your back.
Also I really appreciate the help you have given me as I have HR as one of the 31,023 job responsibilities that I have.
I think that Justin is right, you have brands that want all sorts of bloggers, it just depends on what resonates with the particular brand and reader. I have a decent readership and I mae enough to make my car payment, this was something I was doing for free so that works for me. If Dave and I got divorced, it would be back to work for me. To make this your business, you have to put in way more hours than I am willing to trade for time with my kids right now… I think most people have no idea what a commitment it takes. (And I think you illustrated it well in your post.)
Yes, I think different brands like different things. I can’t really see you doing work for KY Jelly. I have. I can’t do work for KitchenAid, as I am not even sure where my appliances are located or if they even work.
But if you want to make real money at this, like you said, it’s a commitment. A big one. And see? I knew you were smart. If you had to go back to work – you would go back to work.
Preach it sister!
Agreed. At the very beginning, I thought the exact same as you did, but I very quickly realized that wasn’t how it works. Also? I very quickly realized I’M TOTALLY OKAY WITH THAT. I’ve made $300, and that’s more than enough to make me happy. People are reading what I write, and even doing it for free or just a small amount of money…IT’S LIKE METH. I love writing, I love people appreciating what I’m writing, so even just doing this for free, when I have the time, totally feeds my addiction. I’m in nursing school full-time…I have no plans on making this my dependable income, like Brittany, or even like you do. At this point, I’m happy with where I am, just having people tell me now and then that I’m either awful or awesome.
Okay, so basically what I’m saying is, I just like the attention. Money? Whatever. TELL ME YOU THINK I’M PRETTY AND FUNNY AND TALENTED.
YOU’RE PRETTY AND FUNNY AND TALENTED! NOW TELL ME!
OMG YOU’RE SO PRETTY AND FUNNY AND TALENTED XOXO
Oh how I wish this comment was mine. It states exactly how I feel *claps* Well said, Kristen, well said.
I have had the opportunity to make some money with my blog but I didn’t start blogging to make money. I just want to write, make people laugh, tell a good story and have people tell me I am fabulous.
Meredith- I think it is so awesome the opportunities you have gotten from this blog. You are an amazing person and deserve every one.
You’re also still a nurse, Jen. You weren’t crazy enough to give up your career to stay at home, crossing your fingers, hoping this works out for you.
That’s where the real shame lies. I see it happen. I have people talk to me all the time about wanting to make it happen. Things like, “I think I’ll start a blog and make money instead of going back after my maternity leave ends.” And I just scratch my head, thinking, “I thought that woman was smart. Because that sounds like the dumbest idea I’ve ever heard.”
See, I don’t get that either. I guess its kinda like all those people who try out for American Idol hoping to be the next big thing.
It ain’t gonna happen… it takes years of practice and work, lots and lots of hard, hard work.
I am into my second year as a blogger, and though I did start out thinking I would make money, it took me about one month to realize how far-fetched of an idea that was. I then decided to just try and be a goofball and try to get a laugh out of people, just for the heck of it, and that simple aspiration has carried my blog along. I still make no money from it, but there is something enjoyable about just doing it anyways, and I hope some of the 18 million women who blog at least get that little thrill of satisfaction that comes from someone reading and enjoying your stuff.
Yes, I think I did the same thing.
“I’m gonna be rich!” turned into “That sounds super hard. I’m just gonna be funny!”
Well done Meredith. If I had gotten into blogging for the money, I’d be crying in my cheerios every day. I’ve been blogging for almost three years as well and I’ve made: $0. Yep. BUT, I haven’t gone out and tried to hook up with brands or any of that stuff. I’m not actually seeking money through the blog directly because one of the reasons I started it was to talk about writing and my books. (You should go buy those, you guys). And I have had sales on books, some of which I know have come directly from blog posts, but I have to admit that over the years the blog has gotten WAY more personal than it started out and I’m okay with that.
I have had people ask me already how to make money on it. Cause they think that I (with my small, small following) must be making a bunch of money, so from now on I’m just going to give them the link to this post.
Thank you!
Funny, this has been on my mind lately too. I’ve been reading a ton of travel blogs lately and just about every single one has a post addressing the many requests to learn how to make money traveling the world. They don’t travel to specific spots JUST to write about them or sound exotic so the NY Times picks up their article; they don’t (or at least, didn’t in the beginning) post SEO keywords to drive a ton of traffic to their site to make a dollar; they don’t address a “certain” audience…they just WRITE.
And exactly what Justin said, businesses/brands are just as bad and think that their social media presence will blow up overnight.
I know we can point out the fake blogs, but I wonder how many others (who aren’t as tuned in) can’t tell the difference.
Right? How many copy-cat blogs are out there? My guess? ALMOST 17 MILLION.
I used to roll my eyes when people called me “relatable.” It sounded so boring to me. Now? I love it. REAL AND RAW – the only blogs I will read. Love you, M! xo
That’s why I fell in love with you!
I don’t write to make money. I write to write.
I’m more or less anonymous so my blog doesn’t get back to my family, my sorority (former employment), or current work place. I’ve written extraordinarily personal things from Day One.
After my first year, I still have very few followers, but my boyfriend & I are going to be featured in a documentary after meeting with just one follower. Quality over quantity, right?
Blogs that are picture-heavy and do lots of giveaways drive me crazy. They just seem so fake. Even if I’m only posting a few times a month, I’d rather they be raw, honest, and well-written posts than Instaspam.
I like it that you write just to write and you’re so honest. See? You aren’t fake, and you aren’t trying to make some money (like me), but you STILL remain honest for the sake of being honest.
Well put. I just recently talked about this a little. I had a chance to freelance write and be paid for it and the minute someone confirmed it would be paid for – my passion to write was gone. So I nixed that idea. It was never the plan to make money. It was a plan to continue writing my every feeling just as I have done since I could hold a pen. It just so happens I do it on the net now. And other people read it. I’m anonymous so I don’t have to filter too much and I love that but sometimes on the flip side I feel disconnected. If I never make a single cent, I’ll never stop. Not ever.
This is a great post, very good food for thought.
All about me: I have zero expectations of making money as a blogger. But I do have an ulterior motive, in that I hope to gain impressive enough readership that it will make me more appealing to literary agents and publishers. It’s a tool for me, a way to help achieve the extremely reasonable goal of being the next David Sedaris. Realistic, I am.
But I’ve noticed that even just with the goal of writing funny things and having lots of people read them, it’s an immense amount of work. If one of my kids is sick and I only update once in five days, my readership bottoms out. Attention spans are short, you only keep people if you’re giving them great new material every 2-3 days (and even that is pushing it). It’s HARD to come up with new, quality material that often. About a third of what I write never makes it to my blog because it’s total garbage, and if the muse isn’t with me then it’s a struggle to figure out whether to let the blog go stale for 5 days or to post junk.
So, yeah. A lot of work.
And I’ve kept my day job.
I’ve tried to start blogging twice because I feel like I always have so much to say and I love to write. However, I just don’t have the guts to put it all out there. I do but I can’t publish it. I just know that I have a “reputation” to maintain and well I guess I just can’t let it go. It is hard to feel like only a handful of your friends know ALL of you. I don’t show some people a FAKE me but a lot of people don’t get ALL of me. I think I can be too much for some people. I am a loud, fast talking, ab inappropriate joke teller, frequent curser, mom of two, who has no shame about body functions and will answer any question ever asked with a straight face because I just don’t care if the answer is embarassing to me or you. I also have a lot of empathy and I always find myself listening to people’s problems and wanting to fix them for them- which is no bueno for me. I also have a shit ton of family drama and to write and omit that would be an out and out lie and I could never put that out there on the internets for all to see so instead I write for me and then delete.
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